THE LETTER C IS USELESS!!
See, here's the thing. Letters make sounds. We combine these sounds to make words. We have 26 letters, each making a unique sound... except C. C just copies K and S. Think about it... cake, cough, cycle, climb, crumble, cut... all making the K sound. circle, ceiling, celebrate, cinema... S sound. This is true of all words, except ones with the ch digraph. But there, it's making a totally new sound that has nothing to do with the c or the h. I could just have easily as decided to spell the words xhurxh or xhives, and said that "xh" makes that noise.
Then our alphabet would be a nice clean looking 5x5 box:
A C D E F
G H I J K
G H I J K
L M N O P
Q R S T U
V W X Y ZNow, I totally think this is the most brilliant idea ever. My friends pretty much think I am brain damaged. They challenged me to go a certain length of time not typing the letter C. I lasted about 5 minutes before I saw something sparkly and forgot about it. But I'm going to try it for the rest of this post, and see if I can keep it up.
My letter C (I have to use it there, that'll be the last!) revelation was one of my best. Resently I "invented" a groshery kart GPS to help you lokate food in unknown supermarkets. I have three MSpaint depiktions of this whixh I will post soon. Another "invention" of mine is the leftover kooler, a pop-up kontainer that plugs into your sigarette lighter to keep your leftover food from smelling up your kar. The ingenious part of this invention is the pop-up aspekt, bekause it will easily store under a kar seat until needed. Now, you're probably thinking these aren't suxh great ideas. But that's just bekause you're distrakted by all of the red squiggly underlines, like I am. In fakt, it's so annoying that I'm just going to end this post here.
Oh. No. You. Didn't.
ReplyDeleteANNA EMILIE BROWNLEE. There are so many problems with this post, I don't even know where to start. But I'll start with the letter C.
If you get rid of the C, my name will be spelled Krystal Marie Kash. Firstly, I don't want my initials to be remniscent of Krispy Kreme, because then I will be hungry ALL the time. Secondly, what if I were to marry someone else whose last name started with a K, since you are banning all C's it's more of a possibility. Then, because I would keep my last name as my middle name, my initials would be KKK and I would have to kill myself. Thanks a lot Anna, by writing this post, you are wishing suicide on me. I won't forget this.
My second issue with this post, other than my obvious disdain for your "Down with C" campaign is that you have now revealed almost ALL of our inventions to the general public. What is the point of us shouting patent pending at the air everytime we come up with a good idea if you are just going to right a post, exposing all of our glory and NOT EVEN WRITE THE WORDS PATENT PENDING in it.
Ugh, Anna. You must be stopped.